Panel tomorrow

Just thought it might be good to get a record of the day before panel. Tomorrow feels like it's the real start of something. The last five months have been warming up. I guess when you start this process you are thinking about having a family (however that's made up) and it is very child focused. You think about holidays and school plays and all the fun stuff you remember from your childhood. You are aware that adopted kids will have some "issues" but you know that with your love they will be fine. Then you start the home visits and its a lot like therapy, talking about you and your past. Then Prep group shows you all the other sides, abuse, birth families perspective, medical and psychological impact of children. You also start your own research and read about primal wounds and attachment disorders and you basically stay thinking why would I want a monster living with us!? But then once you get a little break towards the end whilst your report is written you start to breath, relax and remember about being a family. The desire/need to open your home to a child or children and to be there to help repair the damage and support them into being grown ups.

In our report it was highlighted that I am an optimist and that my expectations might not be met. I completely agree with the observation but it is something I'm proud of. I have worked with some challenging children and I know how tough it can be but without optimism why would you carry on challenging them. I can get better, they can be repaired.

I made an analogy on New Family Social about panel that I thought I'd share on here. It was said as a joke but the more I think about it the more apt it is. Panel is like taking a pregnancy test - you've done the deed, you want to know if you're going to have a kid so you pee on a stick and then wait. Matching is like waiting for the blue line to appear, matching panel is labour then intros is the big push. I'm aware the time scale is different and it might take a year for the blue line but overall it works! I don't think I will share this with panel but as someone said on NFS - wish us "good luck for peeing" tomorrow!

Comments

  1. Anonymous16 April 2013 at 06:33

    I'm going to de-cloak myself today as a lurker, to wish you all the very best - this stranger will think of you tomorrow and send you lots of positive fatherly vibes for the panel to see!

    Good luck :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown16 April 2013 at 06:50

    Thank you!

    ReplyDelete

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