Delayed post ...
Update from Tuesday's session - I tried to write this up the other day but I was still a little confused. Session basically went fine, We have a date for panel as April 17th. Its been pushed back a little but it actually suits us better with work etc. We have our observation booked for next week then one more booked for the week after then we will be done. SW will head off and write our report up, we'll read it and have the independent assessment then on to panel. It has flown by. Feels crazy to think we are nearly over this section. We also talked about how we planned to parent, deal with issues and what we'd be prepared to take on as far as special needs etc.
It was all fairly painless and straight forward. The reason I haven't been able to post about it earlier is because of the older child we have expressed an interest in. I feel very muddled about what we should do and how we should feel about him. The reality is that it would be easier for us if we weren't matched with him or if we didn't feel the connection to him when we read his CPR. But we do still feel very connected to him and however much we talk about not continuing with him the more we can't walk away from him. We are opening a new business next month and there is a lot of pressure on us at the moment then, hopefully, we'll have a busy summer in the shop and Ben is booked to go away in November so actually it would be easier all round if we got approved (fingers crossed) then took six months "off" and didn't actively look at any children's profiles until the end of the year. This also would fit in more with our original ideas that the process would be longer. HOWEVER ..... we just can't say a definite no to this boy. We had a long chat the night before our last session and had pretty much decided to walk away but when we woke up in the morning both of us were feeling very sad about that choice.
We vocalised all of this to our social worker who understood where we were coming from. We have decided to not rush through meetings with the child's SW and wait until we get approved then start the matching process with him properly. This gives us a month to get the shop open and to make work life a little calmer/more manageable and also it means that it the earliest that we would start introductions is may (if the match works out). This just gives us enough breathing space to work out how we feel about having an older child and what, if anything, we'd be "missing out on" (something our SW is worried about for us)
My head is scrambled. Usually writing this blog helps me see things a little clearer but not today. Hey ho, onwards and upwards.
It was all fairly painless and straight forward. The reason I haven't been able to post about it earlier is because of the older child we have expressed an interest in. I feel very muddled about what we should do and how we should feel about him. The reality is that it would be easier for us if we weren't matched with him or if we didn't feel the connection to him when we read his CPR. But we do still feel very connected to him and however much we talk about not continuing with him the more we can't walk away from him. We are opening a new business next month and there is a lot of pressure on us at the moment then, hopefully, we'll have a busy summer in the shop and Ben is booked to go away in November so actually it would be easier all round if we got approved (fingers crossed) then took six months "off" and didn't actively look at any children's profiles until the end of the year. This also would fit in more with our original ideas that the process would be longer. HOWEVER ..... we just can't say a definite no to this boy. We had a long chat the night before our last session and had pretty much decided to walk away but when we woke up in the morning both of us were feeling very sad about that choice.
We vocalised all of this to our social worker who understood where we were coming from. We have decided to not rush through meetings with the child's SW and wait until we get approved then start the matching process with him properly. This gives us a month to get the shop open and to make work life a little calmer/more manageable and also it means that it the earliest that we would start introductions is may (if the match works out). This just gives us enough breathing space to work out how we feel about having an older child and what, if anything, we'd be "missing out on" (something our SW is worried about for us)
My head is scrambled. Usually writing this blog helps me see things a little clearer but not today. Hey ho, onwards and upwards.
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